I was in an accident in late January. My wife and I were coming back from picking up some ice cream. It was a little after dark. Suddenly, with only tens of feet between us, some moron pulled into my lane. He was in a smaller car, Pontiac Grand Am, but that combined with his excessive speed was enough to push my Sequoia backwards.
Two weeks prior I had been enjoying sailing in the Keys. A friend there encouraged me to stay for a couple of months. I wished I had listened. I could have been spending the last few months fishing everyday and spending my evenings at water front bars, listening to live music. Instead, I rode a wheel chair and hospital bed.
Its a big change, going from having non stop fun, pursuing one’s dream, to getting run over (so to speak). But it happens every day. Today, someone completely believing they are in control will get behind the wheel, completely drunk, and kill someone. If their victim is lucky, like me, they will only have to suffer through pain and mild indignity. So don’t drink and drive or drink and boat.
The upside has been to experience life completely dependent on other people. You don’t think that’s an upside? It is, as long as its temporary. For someone that is shamelessly cynical, like myself, this dependency forces one to face their own incompetence and grow an appreciation for what other people have to offer. Basically, most people are good and are willing to give of themselves completely to those in need.
Now you think I would have learned this already. Of course, I did learn it. But over the years I have let doubt in this lesson creep in. This coincided with the mis-belief that somehow my own perfection was obtainable. But accidents have a way of showing you how little control you have over your life. In fact, for the most part, one can’t really protect oneself; whether from a drunk driver, the sea, or just regular people. Of course this does not mean take unnecessary risks, but just know that once you have prepared yourself and done everything right, a successful outcome is not guaranteed. Stuff happens.
Its how you handle the “stuff” that makes the real difference. If I had taken the approach or attitude of “WHY did this happen to me?”, it would have taken a lot out of my spirit and devastated the moral of those around me. Instead, I approached my injuries with an attitude of gratefulness for the opportunity to overcome. And overcoming it I am. After 5 months in a wheel chair I am sort of walking again and have even gone sailing a few times. This is all made possible by a good crew around me.
Stay safe